Two divorces, 4 downsizings, now what?

Life happens. Sometimes it's good, sometimes not so much.

Whether you're dealing with a layoff, downsizing, position eliminated, or a divorce, or other problems that are more intense in the over-50 time of life, there are tactics and strategies we can use to help us get to the other side of these challenges.

I won't kid you, I certainly don't have all of the answers. I have however stumbled through many of these difficulties, and have found a variety of ways to get unstuck and put these challenges in your rear view mirror.

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My plan wasn't to start over after 50, seriously.

Sadly, we don't always get to choose how things go. Whether it's an outside influence like a company's bad management, or a recession, or even just a bad decision.

We can however get stuck in both our feelings and circumstances. Hopelessness is a terrible feeling, and it can happen to anyone.

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Set aside the should's

Have you ever found yourself hearing your mom, or dad, or brother, or that bully from high school in your head with that "don't do it", or "you better not", or other thoughts that are not your own?

Well, I have.

And it is uncomfortable realizing that even as a grown man, I am influenced by things that happened years ago, sometimes decades ago, rather than by my own thoughts and values.

The first step to getting past these unwelcome influences is to identify them.

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Single, starting over, on the other side of 50

Yes, we didn't plan this.

No, it's not fun.

Yes, it's kind of embarrassing.

No, this isn't typically when your lottery numbers come up.

So, we either find a way through, or we allow the obstacles to stop us. We either listen to the negatives we've collected over the years, or we collect ourselves and start over.

I'll be talking about starting over quite a bit over the next several posts, as it's a skill that if learned, will serve us well as we make progress.

 

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Next Steps...

In the coming months I'll have a collection of my favorite books, speakers, and habits that I've found helpful. Hopefully you'll find some of these helpful as well. And please, drop me a note with any resources you've found helped, I'd love to share.